My newest nephew, Tristan Alan, was born last Thursday, August 4.
To say his birth was as exciting to me as my own babies’ births would not be at all an exaggeration. The reason I feel so strongly about Tristan’s entrance into the world is because my sister, Trina, asked me to be there for his arrival. Having always been the one in the hospital bed groaning, moaning and otherwise oblivious to most everything around me as I tried to cope with the pain, I wasn’t sure what it would be like to be on the other side of the delivery, but I was excited to pieces that Trina wanted me there.
I got to be there with her and Troy, her husband, pretty much from the time she got to the hospital. It was hard to watch her in labor, especially as it progressed, because I wanted to do something to ease her pain, but knew I was completely helpless other than to encourage her. I wasn’t any more a fan of seeing my little sister in pain than I am seeing my kids sick or injured.
The most amazing part was, of course, when the little guy popped out. I was touched suddenly and rather unexpectedly by the enormity of the miracle this event was and tears came to my eyes. It was one of the most emotional and best moments of my life. When you’re the one trying to get the kid out, your teeth gritted, your eyes clenched shut and your whole body straining, you just can’t appreciate that moment like you do when you’re witnessing it physically unattached and pain-free.
The end result:
My end result:
Horrible, unrelenting baby fever.
Nothing on this great, green earth brings me joy like holding a baby, particularly a newborn baby, does. I’ve already held Tristan as much as I possibly can and each time, I’m so happy, I want to cry.
So, really, it’s probably the joy that I’m craving more than the actual baby. Because babies turn into toddlers, who turn into little kids, who turn into bigger kids, who turn into teenagers, etc., etc.
I’m not saying my kids don’t bring me joy; they do, on a pretty regular basis. But there’s just something about a baby that is unlike anything else. It’s my form of crack, I guess.
I’m starting to come to terms more with the reality that I’m going to have to enjoy my baby nephews and nieces and, eventually, in the WAY distant future (I hope), my grandchildren instead. My time is over. While that’s supremely sad for me, I’m not going to dwell on it and miss all the cool and amazing moments in my kids’ lives, which are completely different from, but no less important than, a baby.
Maybe it’s time to get the companion dog I’ve been wanting for years.
Do you get baby fever? Are you done having kids but sad that you are? Share here!
Loved this post. And being an opera lover, I love the name Tristan.
Do you get baby fever?
A friend just linked me to this post b/c I was going on and on about a bad case of baby-fever I am dealing with. I have 3 kids (16 yo son, almost 13 yo son & almost 7 yo daughter) and cannot have anymore kids (and honestly I think I am like you, I think I yearn for that joy/unequaled bonding that I had with all 3 of them, not so much the BABY itself lol…well that and the photo opportunities again hahahahaha). I DETEST potty training and in my heart know that I would remember really quickly why I was “ok” with my daughter being our last, but yes, I get baby fever on a regular basis (I am a photographer and every time I meet a baby for a session I melt).
Are you done having kids but sad that you are?
and still married to the same man!), and I really think that having a life outside of babies is going to be an amazing thing! So yes I am sad but also looking forward to the future when I can be “more friend than mom”…(meaning that right now I tell my kids all the time “I WANT you to like me, but if you don’t I am okay with that too. First and foremost I am mom, we have plenty of time to be friends when I have raised you the best I know how.”
)
I am, on both counts. I am closing in on 35 yrs old and I keep thinking “I could have had at least 2 more babies…” but again, I think for me it is for the best. I have been a momma/wife since a couple months before I graduated high school (graduated with a 3.125
(sorry for the novel, meant to answer with a simple sentence or two
By the way, your nephew is GORGEOUS!
I get extremely bad baby fever every time I am around a newborn. I currently have three children. One day, planning on having at least one more. The cool thing about my baby fever right now? Just had a baby last Monday (the 8th) so my baby fever is cured for a while:)
By the way, your nephew is adorable!!
Fantacy, thanks for your response. I’ve actually replied a couple times now, but it never seems to post. Grrr.
Like you, I’m edging closer to 40 than 30. I know lots of people start having their kids at my age, but I just can’t even imagine starting all over again, despite my love of babies. I had all my kids by the time I was 28.
That said, if somehow it became possible for me to have another baby, I totally would. I adore kids at every stage (though I, too, HATE the potty training phase) and I think they are always a blessing. But as it stands — divorced, 4 kids, and my youngest is 7 — it’s just completely impractical, so I have to go through a mini-grieving period every once in awhile that it’s truly over for me. Sniff.
I love your parenting philosophy, which is similar to my own. Of course, I want my kids to like me, but if they don’t sometimes, that’s just life. I certainly don’t want to teach them that the world revolves around them or that disappointment doesn’t happen. Plus, as you pointed out, there is plenty of time for us to be friends when I’ve completed my job.
I guess you and I will continue to have to get our baby fixes via other peoples’ babies. At least we don’t have to be up with them at night, right?
Victoria, your baby fever should be staved for awhile, huh? =) Congrats on your new baby. Enjoy!